/Mario's bots

Cazzinator

Deletes the media in a group after a delay you choose.

What it does

Put #dick in the caption of a photo or a video and the bot deletes it after a while. The default is two hours, but you can ask for your own delay, for example #dick30m, and an admin can change the default for the whole group.

It keeps media heavy chats clean without anybody deleting things by hand. If you want everything to go without typing a command each time, /alldick 3h queues every media that lands in the group.

The same bot also carries /unsplash: it grabs a random photo and writes your text over it, in the style of a motivational quote.

Before you start

Configuration

  1. Add the bot to the group and promote it to admin with Delete messages.
  2. Send a photo with #dick in the caption. The bot replies with the moment the media will disappear.
  3. If two hours is not right for your group, an admin sends /setdick 30m (or 1h30m, up to 24 hours).
  4. For a one off you can override the default by sticking the time onto the command: #dick10m in the caption, or /dick10m as a reply to the media.
  5. To delete everything automatically, a group admin sends /alldick 3h. /noalldick turns it back off.

Commands

The delete commands work with / and with #. /unsplash needs the slash.

For everyone, in a group

CommandWhat it doesWhoWhere
#dick in the captionThe media is deleted after the group default, two hours unless somebody changed it. It can sit anywhere in the captioneveryoneGroup
#dick1h30m in the captionThe same, with the delay you pickeveryoneGroup
/dick replying to a mediaSchedules the deletion of a media already senteveryoneGroup
/dick1h30m replying to a mediaThe same, with the delay you pickeveryoneGroup
/unsplash textSends a random photo with your text, your name and your username on iteveryoneGroup and private
/unsplash replying to a messageThe same, but it takes the text and the name from the message you reply toeveryoneGroup and private

For group admins

CommandWhat it doesWhoWhere
/setdick 1h30mSets the group default delay. The cap is 24 hours, anything above is trimmedgroup adminGroup
/alldick 3hTurns on automatic deletion of every media in the group and sets the delay. The time is always requiredgroup adminGroup
/noalldickTurns automatic deletion offgroup adminGroup

Write the delay with no spaces, in hours and minutes: 30m, 2h, 1h30m. Send it empty and the bot answers with the correct example.

If you own a clone

CommandWhat it doesWhoWhere
/modulesOpens the list of the bot's features: tap one to turn it on or off. /moduli works toothe clone's ownerPrivate

A clone starts with the features picked when it was created, but that is not final: from /modules you can turn the others on, or turn off the ones you do not need, at any time.

If the bot changes hands, open @BotFather, ask for the bot token with /token and forward that message to the bot itself: from then on it is yours and the previous owner no longer manages it. Right after that, use /revoke in @BotFather, otherwise whoever had it before can still use the old token.

Buttons and automatic behaviour

The bot has no buttons.

For every scheduled media it replies with "This message will be deleted" and the moment it will happen. That notice disappears together with the media, so nothing is left behind in the chat.

Send the command again on the same media and the old timer is dropped in favour of the new one. That also covers editing the caption to add the command after sending the media: the bot reads the edited caption.

With albums the bot handles every photo together: the command on one of them takes all of them away.

With /alldick on, the bot queues every photo, video, GIF, sticker, video note, story and document that arrives in the group, with nobody typing anything.

Frequently asked questions

I wrote #dick and nothing happened

Almost always the Delete messages permission is missing. The bot stays quiet when it does not have it, because it already knows the deletion would fail. Check the word too: in a clone it can be something other than dick.

What are the defaults?

Two hours for a single media, three hours for the automatic deletion of /alldick. An admin changes the first one with /setdick.

Can I set a week?

No. The cap is 24 hours and above it the bot trims the value. That is not an arbitrary choice: Telegram does not let a bot delete other people's messages older than 48 hours.

Does it delete text messages too?

No. The reply form schedules whatever message you replied to, but the automatic deletion of /alldick only looks at media: photos, videos, GIFs, stickers, video notes, stories and documents.

Who can turn automatic deletion on?

Group admins only, same as /setdick. Everyone else can still have their own media deleted, by putting #dick in the caption or replying to the media with /dick.

Which photo does /unsplash use?

A random one from Unsplash, different every time. The text goes on top in capitals, with the name of whoever asked, or of whoever wrote the message you replied to, underneath.

Create your own clone